Witty Songs

ŠTed Schaar 2011

12.  "Dropkick Me Jesus Through the Goalposts of Life."

This classic in the clever title genre was recorded by Bobby Bare and written by Paul Craft in 1976. I remember hearing "Dropkick Me Jesus..." when it first came out and thinking it was strictly for laughs.  But now that I'm older, and a total Nontheist, I'm not so sure.   'Course if Jesus exists and truly is a football fan, one thing is certain:  He roots for the Green Bay Packers.   (Visit YouTube [Bare] for the song).

Lyrics

Drop-kick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life 
End over end, neither left nor the right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop-kick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life

Make me, oh, make me, Lord, more than I am
Make me a piece in your master game plan
Free from the earthly temptations below
I've got the will, Lord, if you got the toe.

Drop-kick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life 
End over end, neither left nor the right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop-kick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life

Bring on the brothers who've gone on before
And all of the sisters who've knocked on your door
All the departed dear loved ones of mine
Stick 'em up front in the offensive line

Drop-kick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life 
End over end, neither left nor the right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop-kick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life

A lowly bench warmer I'm contented to be
Until the time when you have need of me
The flash on the big scoreboard signs from on high
The big Super Bowl way up in the sky

Drop-kick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life 
End over end, neither left nor the right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop-kick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life

Yeah, drop-kick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life 
End over end, neither left nor the right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop-kick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life




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